February 13, 2009

Change ++

" Something's seriously wrong with you." It clearly is. It most definitely is. These are the following pieces of evidence that I have gathered in an hour of hypothesis gazing past at the past thirty days or so.

(i) A sudden affinity for doing things that I so clearly told myself to avoid. One stroke of luck is that its not stagnant at all, it keeps waxing ( when there are no tests to look ahead, or on the slightest smell of a cigarette, er... holiday ) and waning ( in the eleventh hour of pending important work ).

What did I do? I found that if I looked at every single work to be done as important and gave it the highest priority, things would most certainly fall in place. The moment I postponed or showed disrespect they slipped off the track.

(ii) Going more and more silent while in a group. It has happened always and especially more so in the company of people slightly older or many in number. Call it hesitancy to expose my imbecility or call it respect, the issue stays there stuck in my throat and weird replies and expressions find place.
Is it autism??

But, I'm finding it quite comfortable to chat, text messages and to an extent talk over the phone yet my jaws freeze in a face-to-face situation, ya khuda .

(iii) Doubting if I'm any good at all. I have nothing to prove, nothing to tell... ( can also be read as ) I can do nothing, talk nothing...

(iv) After bending a few principles which are must for a good boy, I've found myself weaker and weaker. Has someone said: " Its so easy to lose what you have built over a period of time." Maybe he's right ( scratching the chin ).

(v) Not such a serious issue, but I'm growing very fat. Not a single day passes by without the inclusion of at least one of these things in my diet:

Appy/ Frooti , small chocolates

Hide n' Seek biscuits, Cheese n' Onion: American style Lays chips

Cheese burgers, cheese pizzas ( two slices ), club sandwiches and coke/ cake at midnight ( the most dangerous time to eat these, attached with a lot of fat )

Ice creams!!! ( Kid-style )
" An ice cream mounted with a cherry ,
Keeps the dentist counting and merry. "

Despite all the nonsense I have been doing, as always the positives struck me more important than anything else. And these run thus:
( here is what the counselling part of my brain had to say to my queries )

(I) Its very important to do certain things which people claim are bad. Else how will you ever differentiate between the good and the bad.
We should go to the end of the limits to know where the limits end

(II) Keeping quiet, huh? Good, you are saving energy. My friend, by keeping quiet you hone your listening skills. Being a critical listener is very important for any group discussion :-).

(III) The best way to know about yourself is to actually post-martem your thoughts. You have so much to know, so many excuses to get nusy and kicking :-).
Arise! Awake! And stop not till you reach your goal!

But, negative self-counseling can lead to depression, hence it is never advised.

(IV) Well yes some or the other dumbass would have said that. But didn't Kipling say : ...
Or watch the things you gave your life to broken
And stoop down and build 'em again with worn-out tools

All I would say is that you're becoming a man, my son.

(V) But son , if you don't eat now when the hell will you eat? AFTER PUTTING ON DENTURES??


So, thus these depressing thoughts have actually turned into areas to work upon for self-improvement. And,
"Work is worship"
have to remember that always. If you have read this far, then you ought to leave a comment and also answer a simple question.

Question :
How did you read the title as?

A : Change plus? Plus what... I have my calculator ready.
B : Change plus plus ( incrementing )
C : Change in the most positive sense, hence two '+' signs
D : It is written

The last option was a pure intention to market Slumdog Millionaire :-)
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